Reconnecting is up to us.
Early voting for the 2024 election began in New Mexico this week. No matter who becomes our next President, more than 40% of the country will have voted for someone else. Put another way, no matter whom you vote for, nearly half the country is voting for the other candidate.
Here's the tough part about three successive cycles of close national elections: the issues remain the same and the arguments become more and more personal. Attacks against the candidates and grossly negative campaigns are a given. What is genuinely detrimental to our national character is that these smear campaigns aren't just targeting candidates anymore. We're going after their supporters, too.
Every American has the right to support the candidate of their choice. The Declaration of Independence, which asserts the principles on which our American identity is based, makes very clear the right to "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." The Constitution, which clearly defines the rights of Americans, is iron-clad on freedom of speech.
Sadly, in these polarized political times, too many Americans feel that the best way to exert their liberty and freedom is to insult and belittle those who have the audacity to support the opposition candidate or even belong to a different party.
Those on the right tend toward crudity and even the scatalogical. It's very much a bullying, name-calling mindset. Everyone not voting for Trump is a socialist, a traitor, a snowflake, woke, and those are the printable epithets. Those on the left are simply completely close-minded to the fact that anyone could possibly support Donald Trump and assume the worst of his voting bloc: you're racist, or stupid, or racist because you're stupid (the term "uninformed voters" isn't fooling anyone).
And woe betide the undecided/none-of-the-above voter. Instead of trying to earn your vote, the partisan camps have turned on you, too. The MAGA crowd is going to use its usual insults plus "RINO" if you happen to be conservative, and the Democrats will hint again that you just might be a tiny bit racist. I guess with so few votes left to get, the partisans have given up on you.
I have had a couple political discussions recently, one in person and one online, that were evenhanded, intelligent, and respectful. They each struck me as unusual for our time. We skipped the pejorative labels, talked about the most serious issues facing our nation and our state, and what policies or changes might address them best. In both cases, participants were supporting different candidates.
America can't grow and flourish as two countries divided into political tribes. And I can't reiterate strongly enough, it doesn't matter who wins the election – nearly half the country is going to be mad about it. Voters need to take matters into our own hands and talk about the issues most important to us and stop letting self-christened "influencers" tell us what to believe.
Some characteristics of a productive discussion include:
- Keeping the focus on issues and actions. This keeps the conversation in the realm of what is real, and not on perceptions or personalities.
- Refusal to use ugly words, triggering labels, or belittling terms. "Socialist," "fascist," any crude or profane term, suggesting that a group of voters/supporters lack education, etc.
- Asking "why?" The best way to find out why someone believes what they believe is to ask them.
- Willingness to hear things you don't like or don't agree with. When you ask "why," you may not get an answer you want to hear. That is reality. We have become too comfortable watching our preferred information channels and hearing only the viewpoints we like.
- Seeking some consensus. Where can all parties agree? On that point or those points, how could the existing administration bring about the desired results?
- Laughter. Laughing at the situation we are in makes us co-conspirators instead of partisan rivals.
Neither the next administration – whoever it is – nor the political parties are going to bring the country back together. Yet, the vast majority of Americans agree on the top issues affecting us the most. Posting nasty memes or elitist tropes about the opposition may make us feel good in the moment but only reinforces our division until the next election.
It might seem overly simple or idealistic to demand better. Right now, polls show Democratic vice-presidential candidate Tim Walz as the most favorably viewed candidate out of the two presidential tickets. He's a dad bro sharing casserole recipes who can't recall if he was at Tiananmen Square for the protests or not. I think this shows American voters aren't asking for much at this point. We should be thinking now about better candidates for 2028.
Anger is not the answer. Smug dismissal isn't either. Read real news from real news outlets, not opinions from influencers. Don't be hesitant to talk about what's happening in your community, state or country. Be passionate about your concerns but don't be hateful or patronizing.
And remember. Whether it is Donald Trump or Kamala Harris, we should all want the 47th President of the United States to be successful. Just because you didn't vote for them, why would you want them, and thereby the country you live in, to fail? Patriotism is to the nation, not the party, and not to an individual.
Merritt Hamilton Allen is a PR executive and former Navy officer. She appeared regularly as a panelist on NM PBS and is a frequent guest on News Radio KKOB. A Republican for 36 years, she became an independent upon reading the 2024 Republican platform. She lives amicably with her Democratic husband north of I-40 where they run one head of dog, and two of cat. She can be reached at
